Authentically Adele

For the past few weeks, I’ve been consumed by a topic that touches the depths of the human soul. It’s a delicate subject that resonates with almost everyone because, let’s face it, we’ve all experienced it at some point. Although our circumstances may vary, the emotions, feelings, and pain that come with them are universally relatable. Join me on this heartfelt journey over the next few weeks as I delve into the complex world of family hurt.

In this write-up, “family hurt” means the pain inflicted by those we hold dearest, our flesh and blood. This could be a spouse, a parent, a child, a cousin, or any relative. As you read those two words, “family hurt,” I’m sure your mind instantly summons a memory of when you were wounded by someone you trusted wholeheartedly. It’s not a one-time event; many of us have been repeatedly hurt by the people we loved most, who we believed would always stand by us. And therein lies the depth of the pain – it stems from a source we never expected to cause us such anguish.

For many of us, the word “hurt” barely scratches the surface of what we felt in those moments and the ongoing aftermath. The pain is beyond words, an indescribable torment that engulfs us. When we are trapped in such agony, a maelstrom of thoughts, questions, and statements floods our minds. “Why did they do this to me?” “I thought they loved me!” “I should have seen this coming!” “If someone so close could do this to me, who can I truly rely on or turn to?”

The situation’s complexity deepens because the individuals responsible for our pain are the ones we would typically turn to for solace or support. Yet, unable to confide in them, we are left isolated, grappling with our anguish. Feelings of brokenness, fragility, vulnerability, anxiety, and depression come in like a flood, threatening to drown us. The pain is so profound that it can make us feel physically sick!

A profound yearning arises to withdraw from the world, constructing a protective fortress around our wounded souls. It’s a defence mechanism, an attempt to reassemble the shattered pieces of our life amidst the wreckage.

Here’s the truth: family hurt is, regrettably, an almost inevitable part of life. Why? Because, we cannot dictate the actions or words of others, and it stings so deeply because they are the ones closest to us, and we love them immensely.

Today, I want to remind us that we are not alone, although it might feel that way. We are not the first and won’t be the last to experience being hurt by family. Although this sucks, its a comfort and reassurance to know that others have walked this painful path, endured, and emerged stronger. I believe we can too. 

In my upcoming piece, I’ll share my story and why this topic struck me. I hope that sharing my innermost thoughts and feelings might offer comfort and encouragement to someone who needs it. In the meantime, I pray for each of us going through this. As you navigate this journey of family hurt, know that someone is praying for you.